It is commonly thought and practiced that wedding guests have up to one year to give a gift to the happy couple. While this may be considered standard etiquette practice, it still begs the question of why wait and what are your reasons?
A woman recently "confided" in me that she doesn't send a wedding gift until very close to the couple’s 1-year anniversary (I wondered how she could remember when it was coming) and her reason was simple and scary - she waits to send a gift until she knows the wedding will last (at least a year). I was aghast at this! If she feels this way about the couple, why did she accept the invitation and furthermore, she still attended the wedding and dined and drank and danced at the couple's invitation. As a guest at any hosted party, it is gracious guest behavior to bring a gift to thank the host for all they did to provide you with a lovely evening. Same goes (ESPECIALLY goes) for weddings.
There is also the situation of the person less organized about their social calendar who simply forgets to send a gift. When you remember that you have forgotten, please send that gift right away. Don’t ever make the mistake of thinking the bride and groom no longer care about receiving wedding gifts (or tracking them for that matter, trust me they will know who sent and who didn't).
This brings me to the next point - this rule is plain silly. Let's get real here. You receive a wedding invitation, you send (or bring) a gift. Be gracious and do this immediately. It's a very simple task. Just do it!
Any brides reading this? It's commonly communicated that you have a year to send a thank-you note. Wrong again, do this immediately. For nothing else, to get it off your plate, but also to show that you are grateful for the gifts your guest gave you. If you received a thank-you note almost a year after you gave a gift, would you wonder whether or not your gift went unnoticed or was never received?
In conclusion, my friends, erase this rule from your mind and be swift about sending a gift and swift about writing your thank you notes. Try a new rule - The 2-month rule. You will love it.
Let’s never forget what dear Emily Post tells us etiquette is: A code of behavior based on thoughtfulness….
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